I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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