Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
