how hairy? two words: wookie tits
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
