Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
