ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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