Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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