I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
