I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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