my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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