go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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