Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
