whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
