The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize