Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
it's like iHOP with fire
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
