you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
