Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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