god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
