Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
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Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
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