i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
