so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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