I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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