When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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