My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
