Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
pop tarts are not kleenex
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
