So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
