Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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