it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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