so explain again why im purple
no
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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