I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
