pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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