Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I pour the whiskey from now on
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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