I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
