Grow some girl-balls and come out already
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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