just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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