It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
