no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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