i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
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