im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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