Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
