yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I need to stop coming to work sober
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize