sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I need to sanitize my soul.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
