Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
