Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
That accounts for only three of the penises
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
