just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
