yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
