I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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