Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
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