we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
