i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
