i just identified you from a description of your pipe
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He? As in you personified your dick?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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